CAUTION: Not just fashion content ahead!
I'm not a huge over-sharer but since I'm here I may as well say I've been having a rough year. Sadly, I know I'm not the only one having a not so good time, which is what has inspired me to write a post a little different from my usual style. I'm no expert, but I'm old enough and ugly enough to have learnt a few things about life (and fashion) so I've put them together here for you to reflect on. And maybe also as a reminder for myself if I forget ;)
Okay To Waste Time On: Trashy TV
I think it's healthy to waste time binge watching television shows. If it genuinely makes you happy to spend 7 hours of your Sunday in front of the tele, you should do it. Plus, no one wants to be behind in Game of Thrones, because the internet is dark and full of spoilers.
Not Okay: Trashy People
We can't always control who comes into our lives, but we can control the time and energy we spend on them. If your gut tells you something is off with someone; don't engage! Even if everyone else is (and I know this is especially hard in a work circumstances) but if you get bad vibes, don't be anything more (or less!) than polite.
Okay To Waste Time On: Daydreaming About The Future
Hands up who bought into all that 'The Secret' vibe? I kinda/sorta/maybe believe that we can shape our future through positive thinking. But this is something you want to waste your time on mainly because planning can get you excited for your damn life! You should be counting down the days before a fantastic trip and falling asleep at night imagining your dream house. Good for the soul I say!
Not Okay: Reliving The Past
I get stuck on this one a lot! But it's done, it's over and there is no amount of dissecting that will change what's been and gone (or still limping along). It's simply not productive. Paulo Coehlo (one of my favourite authors) said it the best: "It is important to know when something has reached its end. Closing circles, shutting doors, finishing chapters, it doesn't matter what we call it; what matters is to leave in the past those moments in life that are over".
This can apply to adding pieces to your wardrobe, getting the perfect gift for a loved one or searching for 'the one'. Take your time! I know from experience that you won't love the pair of jeans you rushed into buying (not a metaphor). Don't get caught up in 'needing something now'. This is especially true when looking for a partner because feelings are not the same as heels and it's harder to say 'oops sorry' to a 'bad purchase' (that part is a metaphor).
Not Okay: Pretending It's The Right Thing
We've all done this. And while it is easier to say "Yes, thanks, I love how this skirt twists around while I walk. I'm thrilled to have spent $200 on it" or stay in the wrong relationship because it's less hassle; that just isn't okay. It's better to have nothing or wait for the right thing (see above) than waste your precious time acting. It's draining, false and does nothing for your integrity. Another quote for you, from Mahatma Gandhi this time: "A 'No' uttered from the deepest conviction is better than a 'Yes' merely uttered to please, or worse, to avoid trouble."
Okay To Waste Time On: Creating Special Moments
The older I've gotten the more I've realised how important this is. Wear your pretty underwear even if you have no one to show. Plan a picnic instead of going to a cafe. Put time aside to have dinner with your mum and don't have anywhere to be afterwards; your friends and family deserve your full attention. Explore a hidden path you always noticed but never went down. Eventually you'll start seeing everything as special and unique and trust me, you will smile a lot more.
Not Okay: Rushing Through Life
Life is not about ticking boxes. We're all busy (soz, you're not the only one) and I think we all feel a need to pack as much into a day as possible. But I have friends (no names!) who are constantly running from one thing to another and end up totally burnt out and frazzled. I am guilty of this too! And I've noticed while I'm doing it, I'm not really present (a meditation term for only giving a shit about what's happening now).